what to wear for the sister of groom


My children and I were "awarded" a home from the Homes on the Homefront Program which is under Operation Homefront. In this Program there are guidelines that have to be gone by. Because of my depression/PTSD, it was difficult for me to communicate at times so my parents stepped in to try and help. That was not looked on highly. I have been told several times that I am the one in the program with them and my parents are not. There were also some hiccups with my direct deposit for this "mortgage free" home awarded to us. Those 2 things on my end were fixed because I needed this home for me and my children. There have been SEVERAL things, for a total of 8 months, that have been an INITIAL issue from day 1 with the home that they were to fix and they, to this day have not taken care of it. One of which being an unsecured septic tank in the back yard where my kids can't safely play for fear that they'd get curious and fall in. Now, when I applied for the home, I let them know of my issues upfront. Now that those issues have arose and again and caused me to be non verbal at times or miss communication with them at times, they are taking our home. I let them know that I have been over medicated for some time now and that has been a MAJOR part of the shut down, heavy thoughts of suicide, crying endlessly at times etc. I got a new therapist at a different VA here and she looked at my chart last week. She OMG! You have been being over medicated. They have you on OVER 750mg/daily and you should be on NO MORE than 400/450 a day(Bupropion and Venlafaxine- maxed out on BOTH). She said that that was what had been going on with me. Then Venlafaxine is the one that had me sooooo sick most of the time and an inch from committing suicide. No with new doses adn just in a weeks time, I already feel a difference and feel I'm gaining control of life again. Once I learned of that, I then presented to the Homes on the Homefront people in an attempt to keep our home and to complete the program so that I can get the deed in 2years. I was then told by the program OMG! I'm so sorry to hear that! But uummm....I don't think that will change the decision so don't focus on that. The decision has already been made so let's focus on your move out and the procedures for getting out of our home. So, 19 December, the week of Christmas, we will be homeless. They didn't care that my children, ages 5,6 and 7 would be homeless with me. They didn't care that we have nowhere to go.

Prior to being told we had to leave, I was already told another family was chosen for our home. Seeing as how the notice not only landed me and my children leaving our home the week of Christmas Day and it also disrupts their school year, I requested adjustement be made if possible. Their school is 10 minutes away from the house. Once put out, I will have no way of getting them back and forth to school because they currently ride the bus and their bus stop is LITERALLY our driveway. They are 6, Kindergarten, and 7, 1st Grade.

Not only have I been through enough with my 10 year career and all the residual affects it left me with for life after serving faithfully and honorably, being OVER medicated for months and not knowing until I had an unexpected follow up with my therapist at the VA on 20 November(all documented and meds reduced over 300 mg/day), divorce from their father and all the moving, my children have been through just as much and still don't quite understand it all. I believe vacating in the middle of a school year would be harmful to them in more ways than one. Especially my son Josiah(7yr old). He suffered being bullied at school and also being made fun of because of the ptosis on his left eye. He has come a long way since their start of school at the 1st of August, he has raised his grades to A/B honor roll and he has even made a couple new friends now. Moving them at this point would be harmful to us. On top of that, we've yet to be able to secure a place to live which in turn makes it harder to get them somewhere else at this point. Being homeless with them and moving them is not a good combination as it wouldn't be for anybody, "wounded" or not. Things would most likely digress and put us even further back with and in everything.

The program states and advocates "helping warriors" everywhere I look, even in signature blocks. It also states a lot of things are at the programs discression. That let's me know that if not my caseworker, Andrea Alvarez nor her supervisor, Tabitha John are willing to make this happen, someone within the program surely can.

I never chose any diagnosis or life/lifestyle changes I've received. I never chose to not be able to smile and enjoy the little things in life, especially with my children. I never chose to have bilateral hip surgies to both hips because of injuries I sustained while serving. I never chose to have to live a "different" life than what I was living prior to the incidents and injuries that occurred while actively serving. I never chose to have days that my back and hips would just unexpectedly lock up so bad that I couldn't walk or even get to the bathroom or shower by myself. I never chose feeling hopeless and helpless because these conditions and ailments seem to take over my life. I never chose for my desire for life and helping others to be something I was afraid of or desired less of at times. I never chose to have so much chronic pain at times that it was hard to function like "normal" or just walk or sit down or even grab a can of soup from the cabinet. I never chose migraines so bad that opening my eyes to see my children, sunlight or even the lights in my bedroom hurt so bad and made me nauseas. I never chose to be OVER medicated and get so sick from prescribed medication that I contemplated taking my own life because that's how the medications made me feel. I never chose to sit for periods of time crying and wondering why this happened to me and when will it end or will it EVER end at all. I never chose to not be able to do even the simplest things that were once enjoyable to me. I never chose to be so severely depressed at times that I couldn't leave the house, meet set deadlines, answer the phone or reply to messages- whether text or email. I never chose to be so depressed and OVER medicated that the only thing in the world that seemed to help was shutting myself off from the world- even family at times. I never chose to be dismissed from school because I couldn't concentrate or focus long enough to get assignments completed and turned in. I never chose to have insomnia so bad sometimes that I could get no sleep for days in a row and then when I sleep, it would be for too long. I never chose to have dreams and nightmares so bad of things that happened to me while serving that haunt me even while I'm awake. I never chose to not be able to run and play with my children or take them on outings or even sit with them at the park. I never chose this upside down life I purposely strive to live on purpose, daily. ALL these things chose me and without warning. what to wear for the sister of groom

HOWEVER, WHAT I DID CHOOSE was to serve my country faithfully and honorably for 10 straight active years and make sacrifices that not everyone would/could make and I did so while being away from my children and extended family- and without murmuring and complaining. I was trained from day one in basic training that "The mission comes first." That meant my family last. That was only ONE of the biggest sacrifices I vowed is make. As crazy as it may sound and though my life has tremendously changed, I wouldn't trade it because it was truly an honor to serve My Country. There's nothing I would change. I'd still just learn to cope with it as I'm doing now.

To this very second, they've NOT tried to get us housed or help anywhwere. It's just basically "Get out! The same reasons we accepted into the program and gave you a home is the SAME reason we're kicking you out." Makes no sense at all and it's been very hurtful. I tried to appeal and they decided to deny my appeal and to also notify me of that denial to the appeal the day BEFORE Thanksgiving. Then tell me we still have to be out the week OF Christmas. I've contacted my local news crews, the Attorney General and a lawyer about this. I'm hoping to have a place to call home soon....umtil then, my children and I will take our tree down because they wanted to put it up early this year.



About the septic tank issue....SINCE and AFTER being told we had to leave, I received a call just YESTERDAY(28 Dec 17) that an electrician was coming out to fix the crazy wiring with the septic tank and the wiring issue with the light/fan in the master bathroom. This call also came from the electrician himself, NOT the program. They contacted him and he called me. So I guess they plan to fix their issues before the new family moves in.

Thank you for sharing,

Yovonnie Wordlow